A surrogate mother said she was pressured to terminate her pregnancy because the baby's intended parents wanted twins and became worried about the COVID-19 virus.
A TikTok user named "Heathyr" shared her dramatic story recently on the social media site about one couple she helped to become parents in 2020 when she first started working as a surrogate.
"I had been wanting to be a surrogate for over five years at this point," the woman, who was already a mother to one daughter before signing up with an agency mid-2019, said. "For me to be a parent, that is literally my favorite thing in the world."
Because she was single and opposed abortion, except for severe, life-threatening cases, because of her Catholic faith, it took a while to find a couple to match with, she recalled, in comments first reported by People. She was finally matched with a couple who said they were Catholic and against abortion as well.
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The couple told her they strongly desired to have twins. The mother was in constant communication with the surrogate, sharing pictures of strollers and matching boy/girl outfits they had picked out for their intended twins. But after Heathyr became pregnant in February 2020, her first ultrasound showed only one embryo had stuck.
While she was excited and happy about the pregnancy, the mother's lackluster reaction to Heathyr's one healthy pregnancy alarmed her.
"This really confused me," Heathyr said. "What do you mean? It's a baby. It's a healthy baby. I'm not understanding."
The couple asked her to get a second ultrasound a few weeks later to confirm there wasn't a second baby. After confirming there was only one baby growing, Heathyr's match manager for the surrogacy broke the news that the parents wanted her to have an abortion.
"So she reads me this letter and the gist of it was, ‘Heathyr we are so sorry, but you know, this virus is getting pretty bad, and we just think it would be best for you to have a termination at this time. And we will try again when the virus is over with and we would be happy to work with you again,’" she recalled.
Heathyr says she was stunned by the news and began crying. She wanted to find out what legal rights she had to refuse the request, so she consulted lawyers who assured her that she would not be violating her contract, but the couple didn't want to pay her.
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"Which was fine, that was the least of my worries at that time. I just didn't want to have a termination and just wanted this baby to be loved and cared for, which is why I became a surrogate," Heathyr explained.
But after she refused to have an abortion, the parents became more hostile. They began expressing increased anxiety over the possibility Heathyr would contract the COVID-19 virus as fears about the virus spread.
Her OB-GYN revealed in May 2020 that the father was "harassing" their office every day with emails, calls and mailed letters about COVID-19 cases, she said.
"He was sending her certified mail to the office about the emails. They were pretty much just printed out. And he was calling the office every day," she said.
The couple's lawyers tried to make her sign papers agreeing to abort the baby if she contracted the virus, which Heathyr refused. That made the couple "very upset," she said, so she agreed to test for the virus every month instead.
The couple also refused to accept the baby's ultrasound pictures and didn't tell friends or family they were expecting a child. Even at 38 weeks of pregnancy, they continued to demand the surrogate mother get an abortion if she contracted the virus.
The stressful situation made Heathyr fear for the baby's future. "I was so worried, so stressed every day, like crying myself to sleep," she confessed. "I was just so baffled I was still being asked about termination….this was a full-size baby!"
After the baby was born, the parents seemed to have a change of heart about the situation and happily welcomed their baby.
"I just know, I saw the way they looked at him and the mom was just so happy and crying," Heathyr shared. "And that's what I wanted. You can't force somebody to want a baby, but the whole journey I was so scared. And I just knew when I saw them that they are happy," she remarked.
She said she's chosen to move forward and not "dwell on the past and how agonizing those months were."
"I'm happy that they came around and are just loving their baby," she concluded.
